For Even the Drowning

Poetry/Free Verse

this. here.
a table to be refinished.
a repurposed can from
the plum tomatoes
you bought for Saucy Saturday.

it could never have been
without that lack of oxygen
I don’t mean that the air was thin
it was, of course.
two people sharing the same view
at 14,000 feet sometimes
look out over different vistas.

I appreciate the emptiness of that hike
grateful for even the loss of you.

our son’s imitation Kandinsky
from first grade
concentric circles in a frame
our child’s presentation, as artist

his wooden flute
his bathtub songs
our child growing
and named on the beach
in Tofino, remember?

grateful for even the scar
on my bone
I’ve got one of those seer aches
yes, we both feel the rain coming
yes, for even the emergency room.

your hand in mine
pulling each other
back down from Russian Hill
I told you there was no need
for a diamond, but there it was.

the summer we kissed
northern lights
a dream over our heads
grateful for even the drowning
the loss of you
surfacing and surfacing
through my days.

our life

our child growing up
our growing old
your warm body
reminding me
to let go of such losses
that led me to you.

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The Risk to Love

A Poem

the games we played
the dance we stepped
the deepened laughs we
raised

the oceans’ crests
the candles’ lights
the days we lived with
grace

the pain we numbed
the hope embraced
the fear we gave a
name

the poison’s blood
the marrow’s gold
the chance we chose to
take

the lovers’ risks
the mothers’ eyes
the dreams wish to be
awake

the choice to love
the life to lose
the spark will never
fade

Author’s note: This is the beginning of my thoughts on this. Yesterday, the world lost another beautiful person to cancer. I will miss my friend Grace, who was a shining light to so many people. She had the most courage and strength of anyone I have ever known. And as a former teacher of both her children, I will stand protector of them, even if from afar, forever.

Hold (for Jayna)

Out of the woods
We told each other
We’d tangle our story
And weave these swollen
Vessels and tresses
Into the folds of our love
And the blood of my
Mood pulses through
Your drowning days
Entwined as lovers
First out of the water
Entranced by the cold
Fire we created
Our child grown
Years between those
Promises still kept
And here we stand
At the face of the forest
Still holding your hand
Daring each other
To let go

9/30/18